If you follow me on Facebook, you would have seen posts recently about my girl being admitted to our local animal hospital, Angell Memorial. Quite honestly, it was a scary time. Something that has made a huge difference to me when scary things are going on is to ask for positive energy from my friends. As someone who is so energy sensitive, I can feel it, receive it, and it is so valuable to me during this time.
The second thing I’ve learned to ask is for “no questions ”. The reason is that I’m focused on helping my girl and need to conserve my energy instead of giving it away answering questions. Learning how to do this was a huge power step for me as one thing I’ve determined about women is that we’re taught from a very early age to give it away and not set boundaries.
That’s what I want to talk to you about today. Quite frankly, I learned a lot about setting boundaries from a romantic relationship that started while I was in Corporate. He was very successful and had a phrase “I’m not prepared to talk about this” when he didn’t want to talk about something. I’d see him use it in both his business and personal dealings (including some of our conversations).
Initially, I was shocked, as I never heard anyone ever speak this way. After all, if someone asks you a question…you are taught to answer it. Right? However, he taught me about the importance of boundaries when you needed to protect yourself and your energy. Something that was never taught in school or by my parents. That lesson continues to come in handy to this day.
What I want you to think about is where do you need to set boundaries in your life or business?
• Do you have clients that over-extend their time with you?
• Do you have friends that over-stay their welcome?
• Do you have people calling you during your private time?
• Not being paid on time?
• What else is going on?
What action can you take to change that?
• Turn off your phone during certain hours?
• Have a conversation with certain people?
• What else can you do?
Imagine, if you could take your power and space back by setting boundaries. Understand, that everyone has their own set of what is acceptable and what isn’t. After all, you might be an early riser and think it’s fine to text someone at 7:30 am. However, if that other person doesn’t get going until 9:00 am, you’re interfering with their private time. These are good questions to ask and think about before you step into others space.
Once you set your boundaries, no apologies or saying that “you’re sorry” is needed. In fact, no explanation is required unless you choose to do so.
Back to my girl, Cali. Interestingly enough, only one person asked a question in the thread on Facebook. Another friend immediately posted back to her that I had requested no questions. I loved that. When you respectfully set boundaries, others will respect you.
After all, you teach others how to treat you.
Lastly, I’ve had a few friends who became inspired by how I post “no questions, please” and they now feel empowered to do the same. No one had ever enlightened them or shown them the way to do this.
Learning to ask for what you need and want is one of the most critical actions you can take to learn how to show up in your brilliance. I’m teaching all of that and much more at my brand-new event “Ask For It Live™.” Join us.
Great news! Cali was released out of the hospital after a few days stay and is doing great! Thank you for all of the love and support you sent our way.
Kate Beeders, The Breakthrough Expert and Founder of BRILLIANCE Builders™
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